Published: August 8, 2025
Estimated reading time: 6 minutes
Parenting a teenager comes with plenty of challenges, but when your teen seems more withdrawn, irritable or overwhelmed than usual, it’s natural to wonder: Is this normal adolescent behavior, or are they showing real symptoms of anxiety and depression in teens?
You’re not alone in asking that question. Today’s teens are under a lot of pressure, and mental health conditions like anxiety and depression are more common than many parents realize.
According to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC), poor mental health among adolescents is a public health concern. Four in 10 high school students in the U.S. report feeling sad or hopeless.
“Taking steps to support your teen’s mental health shows them they’re not alone,” said Heather M. Felton, M.D., pediatrician with Norton Children’s Medical Group. “As your child’s pediatrician, we understand the emotional and mental health challenges teens face and can help guide your family toward the right care and resources.”
Common signs of anxiety and depression in teens may include:
Emotional and behavioral signs
Physical and academic signs
Social withdrawal
If these behaviors last more than a couple of weeks or begin to affect your teen’s daily life, it may be time to check in with their pediatrician.
Mental health conditions don’t have one single cause, but several factors can increase the risk of developing one. Risk factors that can lead to teens developing symptoms of depression and anxiety include:
These factors don’t always lead to a mental health condition, but they can provide important context for what your teen may be experiencing.
Opening up a conversation about mental health with your teen can feel intimidating, but it doesn’t have to be a formal, serious sit-down conversation.
“Sometimes the most honest conversations happen in casual, everyday moments, like a car ride or while sharing a chore,” Dr. Felton said. “The key is to approach your teen with calm curiosity, not pressure or judgment.”
Here are some tips to having a conversation about your teen’s depression, anxiety or overall mental health:
Start by choosing the right moment. Look for times when your teen seems relaxed and you can talk without distractions. Avoid bringing it up when emotions are already running high, such as after an argument or in the middle of a stressful situation.
Ask open-ended questions that invite honest reflection, like: “How have things been going for you lately?” or “I’ve noticed you’ve seemed down. Do you want to talk about anything?” This kind of genuine curiosity shows your teen that you’re paying attention and that it’s safe for them to share.
Listen without interrupting. Let them finish their thoughts before jumping in. It can be tempting to offer advice or try to solve the problem right away, but your teen is likely just wanting to feel heard or understood. Give them space to express themselves fully, even if what they’re saying is hard to hear. Don’t respond to their feelings with anger.
Validate their feelings instead of minimizing them. Say things like, “That sounds really tough,” or “I’m glad you told me. I can see why you’d feel that way.” Avoid diminishing what they’re experiencing with comments like, “You’ll get over it,” or “That’s just part of being a kid.” Even if the issue seems small to you, it’s likely very real to them.
Don’t compare their experience to your own or someone else’s. Phrases like “When I was your age …” or “Other kids have it worse” can make teens feel misunderstood or dismissed. Stick to asking questions and offering reassurance. Let them know that it’s OK to feel overwhelmed, that it’s not uncommon for teens to have symptoms of depression or anxiety, and help is always available.
Avoid making the conversation feel like a confrontation. If your teen isn’t ready to talk, let them know the door is open. You can say, “If you ever do want to talk, I’m here. No pressure.” Keeping the tone supportive and consistent helps build trust over time.
Normalize the idea of getting help. Reassure your teen that struggling with mental health doesn’t mean something is “wrong” with them, and talking to a pediatrician, therapist, or counselor is a healthy, positive step. You might say, “Sometimes talking to someone outside the family can really help. Would you be open to trying that?”
What if my teen doesn’t want to talk?
Even with your best efforts, your teen may shut down or say they’re “fine” even when it’s clear they’re showing symptoms of depression or anxiety. This can be frustrating and worrisome, but it’s important to stay calm and available.
Sometimes, teens aren’t ready to open up to a parent, but they may feel more comfortable talking to someone outside the family. Offering another trusted adult can be a helpful next step. This could be:
You can gently suggest these options by saying something like, “If you’d rather talk to someone else, that’s okay. We can help you find someone who will really listen and support you. How does that sound?”
If your teen continues to resist, keep checking in occasionally, without pushing. Even a simple, “Just checking in, how are you doing today?” lets them know you care. When they do choose to talk, they’ll remember how you showed up with patience and support.
Sometimes, a roller coaster of emotions is a natural part of puberty and/or adolescence. But if your teen’s symptoms of depression or anxiety persist, worsen or begin to interfere with their learning, relationships or daily routines, then it’s time to notify their pediatrician.
You should seek help right away if your teen talks about self-harm or suicide, or if they’re engaging in risky or destructive behavior.
If your child is experiencing a mental health crisis, call 988 or visit the nearest emergency department.